Bryan Joiner

1. Goat 1 (0:00-0:21): Just amazing yelling and poise. Totally not flustered, and legitimately seems to need some help. For what? Who knows? But we’re all ears.

2. Goat 3 (0:27-0:42): The authenticity of the scream is just fantastic, even if it’s weak. Let’s face it: Weakness can be funny. You know it, I know it, and the American people know it.

3. Goat 9 (1:42-1:59): A nice angry retort to some regular ol’ bleating. Shit doesn’t always need to be gussied up.

4. Goat 4 (0:54-1:02): Very much of the same school as Goat 1, but without the smooth finish. Underrated (in society as a whole, not on this list).

5. Goat 10 (1:45-1:49): Is higher on other lists. Also very much in the same vein as Goat 1, but in the same way Jerry Stackhouse was in the same vein as Michael Jordan. Good? Yes. More than that? No.

6. Goat 8 (1:36-1:45): So Italian. Major problem: Doesn’t sound like a human. But serious attitude points.

7. Goat 6 (1:02-1:12): Cuter than it is effective. Props the cameraman for acknowledging the absurdity, tho.

8: Goat 4: (0:42:-0:54): Solid bleating, but this is an A/V competition, and you’re on some 8-bit shit.

9: “Goat” 11 (1:59-end):  A lamb. And fake. Still better than…

10. Goat 2/7 (0:21-27, 1:12-1:22): Kill yourself. You’re the worst. Never bleat again. Ever.